I don't have a maid, but...

...I do have two cats who really like to help with chores. Here are some things they excel at:

* Making sure I sweep the floors really thoroughly by messing up the dirt pile over and over
* Cleaning up crumbs from the kitchen floor, the table, the chairs, the carpet, the couch....
* Folding laundry (some would call it lounging about on the freshly cleaned clothes)
* Washing dishes by hand (okay, by tongue)
* Bringing cloth items upstairs to put in the laundry hamper (dish towels, oven mitts, cloth napkins, etc.)
* Putting clean sheets on the bed

Helping me make up the bed with clean sheets is by far their favorite task, and they assist me on a nearly weekly basis. Here's how it goes: First, I take off the old sheets. Then Simon jumps onto the bed, on top of the mattress pad. He proceeds to lie there while I put on the fitted sheet over him. Second, Johnny jumps up on top of the fitted sheet. He pounces on Simon while I put the flat sheet over Johnny. Third, both cats scramble around and wrestle under different layers while I continue to add the blanket and comforter. This is one of those games that your mom always said ends in tears. By the time I've got the pillowcases on the pillows, somebody is usually meowling pathetically and both cats squiggle out from under the sheets and try to get their dignity back. Good luck with that!